


Kingdoms and Killers

by homestekExplained



Series: Royal Homestuck AU - HE [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU, Abuse, Alternate Universe - Derse/Prospit Royalty, Autistic Dave Strider, Autistic Dirk Strider, Autistic Jade Harley, Autistic Jake English, Autistic John Egbert, Autistic Roxy Lalonde, Deaf Karkat Vantas, Derse (Homestuck), Derse and Prospit, F/F, F/M, HoH Karkat Vantas, Homestuck - Freeform, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kidnapping, LGBTQ Character, M/M, Major Character(s), Multi, Neglect, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Jade Harley, Nonbinary Roxy Lalonde, Prospit (Homestuck), Trans Dave Strider, Trans Dirk Strider, Trans Jake English, Trans John Egbert, Trans Karkat Vantas, Trans Rose Lalonde, royal au, tw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:35:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27156010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/homestekExplained/pseuds/homestekExplained
Summary: Your name is DAVE STRIDER, and you have a job to do.TWs will be on every chapter as we go along but general TWs in the tags!Also yes everyone is trans, autistic and polyamorous it's my fanfic and I'm going to project all I want and YOU CAN'T STOP ME!Comments are always appreciated!
Relationships: Calliope/Jane Crocker, Calliope/Jane Crocker/Roxy Lalonde, Calliope/Roxy Lalonde, Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Jake English/Dirk Strider, Jane Crocker/Roxy Lalonde, John Egbert/Dave Strider, John Egbert/Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, John Egbert/Karkat Vantas, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Series: Royal Homestuck AU - HE [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1982207
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	1. A job, a jail

**Author's Note:**

> This was also uploaded on wattpad at the same name!  
> TW: implied suicidal thoughts, death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW, implied child abuse, talk of kidnapping
> 
> Chapter one rewrite is here! I hope you guys enjoyed it and that it doesn't mess up the rest of the chapters lol
> 
> Comments and kudos are appreciated as always!

You are DAVE STRIDER and you got a job to do. It's not an honorable job, nor a job you thought you would want as a kid but it's your job nonetheless. Your job is as an assassin, it has been for coming up on three years now. Your current assignment is to get rid of two important diplomats, the Heir of Prospit and the heir of Derse. The Heir of Prospit is rumored to have some weird wind magic but you hope that won't interfere much with your mission. The heir of Derse has been described as looking very sickly, no matter how much he rests, always looking kind of a pale gray. Rumors have it he is able to do healing magic but that's just rumors. 

Anyways, who these people are barely matters, all that matters is that your brother told you about this jig and you took it. The job is simple, get rid of them before they head out to stay on Prospit for six months, doesn't matter how you get rid of them they just need to not be in any royal castle. Bro joked with you about _kidnapping _them, at least you _hope _it was a joke, that seems kinda inhumane though, so you plan to just kill them quickly and quietly.____

_____ _

_____ _

You might say you're a pro at this point, you quickly get around the rooftop, practicing and slightly failing at flash-stepping like your brother does, and pear into the golden tinted windows until you see a room with a dark haired boy, about your age, deep in slumber. Jackpot. 

You pick the lock and open up the window quietly, pulling down your hood as you try to flash-step in. _Fuuuuck _. You knock a vase over, just barley catching it before it shatters. The Prospitan still seems to be deep asleep, with a calm breathing pattern and complete relaxedness. Relaxed and calm to the point of being obviously fake.__

____

____

You clear your throat as a way to alert him that he isn't too good at fake sleeping. He sighs and sits up “Didn't fool you, huh?” he fucking _laughs _as he puts on his glasses “Is it worth it to ask for you to not kill me? Or at least leave a substantial amount of evidence pointing to you, like maybe a business card?” Okay this dude is weird as hell, he seems way too accepting and happy that he is about to die.__

____

____

“Do you want to do this the easy or the hard way?” you try to deepen your voice, _but who really cares? Isn't he going to die no matter what he thinks of your voice? Well, you really care so take that internal monolog _. It seems the Heir was talking while you were spacing out. “You really don't have to deepen your voice to be taken seriously you know!” he giggled “ _Especially _not by _me _of all people” he was smiling now, fuck- _When was the last time someone smiled at you? _“Maybe you should hang out with different people if no one even smiles at you” you guess he is right- wait did you even say that outloud? “Get out of my head asshole” you don't know whether to be upset or comforted for some reason, but whatever you should feel you guess you aren't feeling it since you're just incredibly confused.________

_____ _

_____ _

“How about we make a deal, I ‘get out of your head’ if you tell me one thing, your name. Hell I’ll tell you mine too!” He smiles at you again and when he makes eye contact you feel a warm shudder going down your spine. “I’ll go first, John Egbert, Heir of Prospit, nice to meet you” he holds out his hand to shake “The names Dave” you step back up into his window “ _Dave Strider _” you look back at him, then jump out of his window.__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah! Johns a special boy (lol)


	2. Good morning, Derse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat meets a new person

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: emotional abuse and implied physical abuse

Your name is Karkat Vantas, you are the heir to the throne of derse. You wakeup and change into your royal outfit before walking down the stairs to a large hallway. 

"Hey Karkat-" someone starts "JEGUS FUCK WHAT- oh, its just you" look over at Dirk, he isnt that much taller then you, slightly round with a heart shaped face covered by his stupid fucking anime shades. Speaking of his looks, you notice he has actually seemingly been dropping weight since around the time you arrived. Now that your looking he doesn't seem healthy at all, it looks like he is keeping all his effort into standing up, looking more tired then you thought was possible and- were those bruises?? 

"The queen was looking for you in the throne room" he snaps you back into reality, looking slightly uncomfortable most likely due to your staring. "Thanks..." you mumble as you walk tords the throne room.

"Ah Karkat! Come sit down!" she waves you over to a throne, your throne, though its twice the size of you. She is the black queen. "Yes mam..." you sit in the throne, it's uncomfortable due to not being fit for you at all. 

"Today you will meet your husband!"

Okay wait what. You haven't heard anything of this, and sure as hell didn't propose to anyone. "What do you mean-" she cuts you off "We are arranging a marriage between the kingdoms of Prospit and Derse for peace. You don't mind getting married to a handsome prince do you?" she held your face like a loving mother, but you knew this was a threat "Of course not... its just... very sudden" she laughs at that. "Oh well little one" you hated when she called you that, and she knew that "Fix your hair they will be here any moment"

You quickly try and fail to brush your super curly hair under control before you see six people walk in. 

"Hey! Your name is Karkat right?" the one standing in the middle says. He had lightly curly black hair, dark tan skin, square glasses, an entirely blue outfit with a golden sash and badge that read PROSPIT and abnormally blue eyes. "Y-yeah... whats-" you try to talk before your cut off, again, this time by the black king "Yes, this is Karkat, our son and prince" he starts talking to another woman, who you assume to be the white queen. The prince is just looking at you with a giddy smile on his face. 

"We should let the children go play, its unfair to bore them with political talk" the white queen says, the prince nods his head before he runs up to you. "Well what are you waiting for? Let's go!" he grabs your hand and starts running down a random corridor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Word count: 474
> 
> what do yall think about the plot so far uwu?


	3. Welcome to Derse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat and John run around in the garden, chaos ensues. 
> 
> No TWs today!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lack of posts! I was in a bad mental state for a while but I’m back now! And you might notice that over my break my writing improved! First of thank you for noticing, and second off it definitely did, as did this story! I finally planned out a story so I may go back and redo the previous chapters to make sense in context to this new story!
> 
> Updates should be once every week or two, maybe less if I am motivated!

===> Be JOHN EGBERT

You grab the hand of the short crabby boy and start running down the many, many, hallways in the Dersian castle. You just narrowly avoid running into the castle semestres, when the prince pulls against you. “Okay okay okay, I get that your exited to be here or some shit, but you almost just fucking ran over Kanaya! Plus, if your trying to get somewhere for the love of Gog can you just tell me where and I’ll show you the way” he sighed and adjusted his impressively curly hair. It was an amazing mix of colors as well, if you were to paint him you would probably use a mixture of cobalt blue and burnt umber for the main of his hair, using just burnt umber for the roots. He also seemed to have a few bits of yellow and orange poking through on each side, you wonder if maybe it was hair dye? If anything it looked most like he had hair clips or even alternian horns under his hair, but that was a blasphemous idea, wasn’t it? “Dammit are you even listening you rotten bulge muncher!?!” He huffs out at you.  
“Absolutely not! Now tell me, does Derse happen to have a garden?”  
He mumbled something along the lines of “Follow me” and started walking deeper into the castle.

About an hour later Karkat and you finally found the garden (and by that you mean you ran around going through every door with Karkat yelling behind you until you ran through it)  
Derse was very cold so you didn’t know what too expect as far as plants went, but you sure didn’t expect a large assortment of fruit trees, a patch of slightly wilting flowers and a green house of berries. “Your lucky you came here at the right time in the summer, usually all the plants are dead as hell. Someone’s been mysteriously taking care of the plants lately through so they are in pretty good condition compared to the weather” You spin in a circle trying to take everything in. Karkat sure wasn’t kidding when he said you came at the right time, this is nothing like the pictures you saw. 

You kneeled down and picked a few flowers, you went over to pick flowers from another area of the garden until you saw a sign “Flowers of the royal family”, further inspecting the garden there were orange lillys, with a few that looked more red tinted then orange labeled as for someone named Dirk Strider, black and white roses for the king and Queen, purple wistarias for someone named Rose Lalonde, pink azaleas for someone’s whos first name was partially scratched out so it just read Ro// Lalonde, and a patch of red sun flowers that seemed to have black tulips thrown onto it, almost seeming to be an attempt to cover and hide the bright red flowers, it didn’t have a name labeled either. 

“Hey Karkat! Come look at these!” You wave him over, he sighs and walks over. “What do you need to show me so bad you- woah.” Even Karkat seems taken aback by the flowers. “Who are these ones for?” You point at the unlabeled flowers. He just looks at the rest of the signs for a few moments before looking over at the sun flowers “Mine of course….” he doesn’t sound to sure of it himself. You decide not to press the issue any further.

“We should be getting back soon, I’m sure the queens and kings will be done soon” you stand up and brush the dirt off your soft dark blue pants. You take a few more flowers while Karkat gets himself presentable, making a point to adjust the hair around the weirdly candy cane colored bits of hair. You put the flowers in your pockets before you both head back. 

After a bit of time you find the throne room and wave goodbye to Karkat. He smirks and waves back as you leave the kingdom of Derse.


	4. Open the door

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave hangs out with John again
> 
> Light TW for intrusive thoughts and emotional flashbacks!

Your name is, what the hell is even the point of doing this again? You know who you are, don’t you? Honestly not really. Let’s try this again.

Your name is Dave Strider, and you just broke into the Prospitain heirs room _again _. You swiftly get in through the window just to find him, _John _, sitting at a table mulling over a piece of paper.____

____“Yo” you make your presence known as he jumps a little, it is pretty obvious to be startled that you just broke in unannounced again. Nonetheless he turns and looks at you “Hey! So you _did _come back huh” you roll your eyes and sit down in a chair near the open window. “Hell yeah, why did you miss me?” you joke  
“Honestly kinda yeah! You actually seem pretty cool to talk to” okay, that was unexpected. “Aw you flatter me” you are damn glad you're wearing a hood so he can’t see you blush.___ _ _ _

______He just laughs in return and turns back to whatever he was doing, glancing over at you as a seemingly invitation to come look at what he is doing. You oblige and walk over to him, looking at his canvas? (You thought it was just thick paper before but nope, this is a canvas) On it is a sketchy rendition of _you _, jumping out of the window as you made your escape yesterday. “Damn Egbert, your pretty good at art” once again, saved by the hood. Your common sense kicks in soon enough though “Are you going to hang this up as my wanted poster or something?” He just stares at you for a moment before he starts _laughing _. “Skaia no! It would be a shitty wanted poster, you could really just chance your clothes and no one could find you then. Plus,” he turns to look at you where he assumes your eyes are “why would I want to get you kicked out or something? For all of you insisting you're a great assassin, I find greater use in you as someone to just have a conversation with” he puts his pencil away and stretches in his chair._____ _ _ _ _ _

___________Oh damn, you didn’t expect to get complimented today. It’s kinda nice _. He once again laughs, as if he could tell what you were thinking. “Hmm, you know I-“ there’s a knock on the door. As it starts to open John practically _throws you across the room _, you end up next to his bed. _Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck- ________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________You look over at John again to find him talking to some large and tall guard. _Duh _, he pushed you over so you wouldn’t get caught by a guard, _not _because he was trying to hurt you. Not _because he was trying to hurt you, not because he was trying to _\- “Dave?” He is sitting on the floor right next to you, too close. Almost right as you think that he steps away a bit. “Sorry about that, I didn’t mean to freak you out, I just didn’t really know what to do” he smiles awkwardly, _fuck _you made this weird, he was just trying to help. “I-it’s chill dude, my bad” you try to keep your voice steady, you fail at that “Are you sure? It doesn’t seem chill” he almost reaches out to touch you before deciding better. “Y-yeah I’m good. I’m just- just gonna go for a bit, I gotta go get something” your brain is buzzing, and not in a good way. In a _‘if someone comes near me there a fifty fifty chance I’ll punch them or start sobbing’ _way. “Dave-“ before John can answer you jump back out the window and head for home.___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sucks to be Dave lmao

**Author's Note:**

> A total of 444 words for this page! Damn that's even
> 
> (edit: now its 454!)


End file.
